Angel's Return
by Sarah A. David
Summary: Angel can't deal with Buffy's death. So he doesn't return after a few months but years later - not knowing what happened during his absence.
1. Part 1

Angel's Return

AUTHOR: Sarah A. David

E-MAIL: SarahADavid@aol.com

DISCLAIMER: „Buffy the Vampire Slayer", „Angel" and associated characters are copyright by Joss Whedon, David Greenwalt, Mutant Enemy Inc., Greenwolf Corp., Kuzui Enterprises, Sandollar Television, Twentieth Century Fox, WB and UPN.

No infringement is intended.

TIMELINE: The story begins after the season finales of BTVS S5 and AtS S2 and goes many years into the future.

SPOILERS: Everything up to BTVS S6 and AtS S3 happened. Events of BTVS S6 and AtS S3 can be part of the story but don't have to.

SUMMARY: Angel can't deal with Buffy's death. So he doesn't return after a few months but years later - not knowing what happened during his absence.

DISTRIBUTION: FFnet. My site. You want it? Ask me!

AUTHOR'S NOTES: I want you to know that English is NOT my mother language, so please ignore my mistakes.

FEEDBACK: Yes please.

RATING: I'm not so sure about the rating system but I guess everyone who watches the shows can read this fic

Part 1

L.A. 2001

Cordelia Chase was filing the cases of Angel Investigations. There had been a few visions over the summer. Things were going really low in L.A. and here was only so much the human associates of A.I. could do. Reintegrating Fred into the human society had been the most exiting activity for so long.

Cordelia sighed and turned to Wesley, "When do you think he's coming back, Wes?"

"I don't know!"

"I mean how long can it take? He's been gone for three months now. He should be over it by now!"

"I don't think so, Cordelia. I believe he will never be over..."

"Never? Are you crazy or what?"

"Cordelia!" Wesley shouted "I don't think you really understand what Buffy meant to Angel!"

"Of course I do. She was his girlfriend. He loved her. He left her. She was his ex, for God's sake!"

"And that's where you are wrong, Cordy. I don't think she ever really was an "ex" for Angel. It's true that he left her but I know that he never stopped to love her - no matter what happened between them when she was here last time. She was his first love, the only love, the love of his life. We talked..."

"Oh, please, I get what you mean. But are you sure?"

"Yes, I am. As I just wanted to explain to you, Angel I talked before he left for the monastery and he told me about his time with Buffy. Did you know that he gave her a Claddagh ring for her 17th birthday?"

"She mentioned a ring. What's a Claddagh?"

"A Claddagh is a very special ring. Two hands.."

"Oh yes, now I know which one you mean. Two hands are holding a heart with a crown on top, right? Angel wore one of these himself."

"Yes, that's the one. But do you know it's meaning?"

"As far as I know it's a friendship ring."

"Well, that's kind of right. Today it's often used as a simple friendship ring. But I mean it's original meaning. It's part of an old Irish custom: The hands represent friendship, the crown stands for devotion and the heart..."

"That's easy: for love. So it's a token of love. But I know he loved and so he gave her a ring. No big! I mean it's not that special to give your girlfriend a ring. What's so special about this one?"

"Like I said today the Claddagh is often used as a symbol for friendship. Rarely people know it's true meaning. But back at the time when Angel was turned it was used differently. Most of the Irish people were very poor so when a couple who fell in love and couldn't afford a proper wedding they exchanged Claddagh rings."

"Now, I see what you mean. So they where kind of engaged?"

"No, that's not what I mean. Angel knew that as a vampire he would never be able to marry Buffy in a proper way. So he used this old Irish custom and gave her the Claddagh. It's a wedding ring!"

"Wait! We're talking about marriage?"

"Not in any legal way. But according to old Irish custom they would have been married. They both wore their rings with the heart pointing inwards. That means you belong to someone."

"Wow! So Angel considered Buffy his wife?"

"Yes, I believe so."

"That's so sad. I mean I know he loved her and that he missed. I've seen his Buffy-face often enough. But this.. I guess it will take a while until he recovers enough to come back to us."

"You're right. So all we can do is wait."

TBC


	2. Part 2

Part 2

The monastery

A month later

The monastery was a very strange place. Not many people - or other creatures know where to find it. It's location was a well kept secret. some of the monks were human and some of them were half demon. All of them saw no longer a reason to live outside the walls of this place. It was their sanctuary. This monastery was not about religion it was about peace and shelter. Some of the monks tended to the gardens, some studied old books and scripts and talked about prophecies. But nobody was forced to do so. In some way each of them lived his own life but together they were a close community of peaceful beings.

Then one day or rather one night four months ago someone new had arrived. It had been more than ten years since the last arrival of a new brother and visitors seldom came. But this night someone was in front of their gate. To say they were surprised would be an understatement. Everyone one of them had heard or read about this creature. Most them knew the facts about his horrible past, some of them had heard rumours nobody wanted to believe. And they certainly had not the wish to grant access to the monastery to the vampire known as the Scourge of Europe. There was no place for an evil demon in this community. All the demons or rather half demons of the community were good demons. And since the foundation of the monastery no vampire had ever been allowed into the sanctuary - not that any of them had ever looked for shelter here but there had been some of them looking for blood.

But then they listened to his story about a gypsy curse, a new beginning and the wish for redemption. And they learned about his love and his loss. Looking into his eyes they saw his grieving soul and so he was allowed to enter.

Angel was walking through the gardens since sunset. After living with the monks for nearly four months he had finally come to a decision. Now he was looking for the abbot to talk to him. He found him sitting on a bench.

"I'm sorry to disturb your thoughts but I need to talk to you."

"There is no need for an excuse. You know I like talking with you, Angel!"

"I have made my decision."

"So are you finally ready to return to L.A. Seeking redemption by saving lost souls is a difficult task but I'm sure you will make you way. You are strong."

"That's not it, father. I wanted to ask for your permission to stay here. How can I save other souls if my own is too weakened, too torn after it lost it's other half. How can I help others when I have lost myself?"

"So you need for time to grieve for her?"

Angel bowed his head "Yes."

"There is no need to be ashamed, my son. You know we grieve with you. The Slayer is a very important warrior. And every loss of one of these special girls is a reason for many tears. But your loss was even greater. You didn't only loose a fellow warrior but also the woman of your heart. Your soul mate even. Angel, you are welcome here. I told you this when you first came to us and I haven't changed my mind. Stay as long as you want. This monastery will be your home until your soul finds the peace it needs."

"Thank you, father. This means a lot to me. And I will contribute to this community as much as I can."

And so Angel stayed in this secret place far away from his friends. Far away from everyone and everything that reminded him of Buffy. It was the only way for him to go on because he still had to much to amend for so greeting the early morning sun was out of the question.

His days and nights were filled with hours full of brooding - no surprise there -, translations of old texts, studying old prophecies, long talks with the monks and the abbot and even gardening in moonlight.

And so the years passed.

TBC


	3. Part 3

Part 3

The monastery

50 years later

Angel was reading in his room when suddenly his opened and somebody entered. Angel looked up and addressed the uninvited visitor.

"You know, it's polite to knock before you enter."

"Hey, Angel, my buddy! How are you?"

"I've been better until a minute ago. What to you want, Whistler?"

The demon shrugged and grinned "Same old"

Angel glared at him: "Could you be more specific? I never liked your cryptic act!"

Whistler laughed: "That's a good joke, kid! You used my cryptic act yourself. And may I say you kind of brought it to perfection! But to answer your question: you're needed. The Powers That Be want your return. The End of Days are near and the final battle will take place at ..."

"... the Hellmouth!" Angel continued for him.

"You know?" Whistler was surprised.

"I guessed." Angel answered "You want me to return to Sunnydale?"

"Yes, I do. The Slayers need your help."

"So nothing has changed, right? Tell me, why should I go? I mean two Slayers will be perfectly capable of fighting the End of Days."

"But Angel what about.."

Angel interrupted the demon again "Ah! My Shanshu! My reward for fighting the End of Days. Can't forget about that! Why didn't you come fifty years earlier when Buffy and I still had a chance to enjoy my reward together? Give me one good reason to return there and fight." Angel dared.

Whistler was very calm when he answered: "Because it's the right thing to do! Because it's your destiny! Because you were born for this!"

"Not good enough, Whistler, sorry. It was nice seeing you again." With that he began to shove the demon to the door. But Whistler turned around again and said: "Because she would have wanted you to go!"

TBC


	4. Part 4

Part 4

Sunnydale

A few days later

Since he had left the airport in L.A. about two hours ago Angel had felt a strong pull. And the nearer he got to Sunnydale the stronger it became. Angel wondered if it was the Hellmouth itself or if he could feel the Slayers like he used to feel Buffy. But then again he never felt Faith that way or any other Slayer he - or rather his demon - had met in all his years. Sure he could recognize a Slayer if he met one but this feeling was nothing compared to the feeling when Buffy was near.

Angel was determined to find the source of this feeling. Another thirty minutes later he was in a cemetery. The place was very familiar to him. Of course he knew all of Sunnydale's cemeteries by heart - or at least those which had been already here fifty years ago. After all he had patrolled them for three years. But this one had a special meaning to him. He had come here shortly before he left for the monastery - to say his final goodbyes to a certain blonde girl.

Was it possible that after all this years he still could feel the remains of her? Angel doubted it but maybe... . After all the feeling in his stomach was now as strong as it had been when he was near Buffy.

He looked around. Although it was already dark there were still some visitors around. Obviously people in Sunnydale were still oblivious to the dangers of the night.

He quickly made his way to the section where he remembered Buffy's grave to be. The cemetery had changed and he hoped that it was still there. He couldn't bare the thought that there might be nothing left of her not even her gravestone as a reminder. Soon he found what he was looking for. This part had changed to. It seemed to be a special section somewhat different than the others. There was a small plate at the entrance. It read "They gave there lives for the world." Angel was surprised - somebody finally noticed?

He continued his way and noticed an old woman sitting on a bench near Buffy's grave. He wondered briefly if he might know her. She seemed to be Buffy's age - well the age she would have been by now. She was watching the gravestones in front of her as well as a girl who currently walked between the graves, leaving flowers on every one of it - except one. She neither looked at Buffy's last resting place nor did she leave some flowers for her. Angel thought it odd.

He went along the gravestones reading the names. Few of them he never heard of but sadly enough there were a lot of names he did know. He wasn't surprised only shocked - after all fifty years were a long time and humans had a short life compared to his - especially when spent this life fighting demons. Tears ran down his cheeks when he read the names of people the had last seen a lifetime ago: Rupert Giles who had did at the ripe age of 92 - not bad for a watcher. Willow Rosenberg - the girl would had restored his soul -had only lived into her 30s. Cordelia Chase had followed her only a few years later. Maybe the visions had finally worn her out. Anyanka Harris. So Xander had married a demon? Angel had not really been surprised to see that Cordy had been buried here in Sunnydale. After all it had been here home town. But the next grave did surprise him. Charles and Winifred Gunn were buried here, too. Fred had died only a few years after he left while Gunn survived his wife for twenty years. It was good to know that they had married but why had they come to Sunnydale? Did they come with Cordy? And what hat happened to Wesley?

Then there was a line of graves that led to Buffy's grave or from it. Reading the stones he realized that they were all teenage girls. Only some of them had reached their 20s. Could it be that they were all Slayers? The grave next to Buffy's seemed to confirm this. The stone read: Faith Dawson. So Sunnydale had become Slayer central?

In the meantime the flower girl had finished her round. She seemed somewhat familiar to Angel. She was a petite blonde. He remembered the time when he first went to L.A.. At that time it was enough for him to see a blonde girl to be reminded of Buffy. She was everywhere. Angel sight. It would be wonderful if this girl were Buffy. But she was dead. And even if she were alive she would be in here seventies by now. But still...

Meanwhile the girl had joined the old woman from the bench and they were now headed for the gate. Angel was thinking about following them but when he moved to do so he heard a voice from behind.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you, vampire!"

Angel turned around. Before him stood a young Asian girl.

"Why not?"

"She would stake you!"

"I think I can take care of myself."

"You think you can take on a Slayer?"

"She's a Slayer?"

"Yes, and she's not the only one around!"

"So you two are the Slayers that guard the Hellmouth?"

"How did you know.."

"I can feel that you are a Slayer. You radiate of power!"

"Ah..thanks.."

"I was sent here to help you."

"Sent here? Wait a minute... are you Angel?"

"You know me?"

"Well, that annoying demon who suddenly appeared here some days ago said he would get you here to help in the final battle. We didn't believe him since nobody knew where you went after you left 50 years ago."

"Sounds like you met Whistler!"

"Yeah, that's him. He's so..."

"I know what you mean. So what's you name?"

"Oh, I'm sorry. Bad manners. My name is Natsuko."

"Nice to meet you, Natsuko. I'm Angel - as you already guessed."

"Nice to meet you, too, Angel. It's a great honour to finally meet the vampire with a soul. I heard so much about you! So, are you done here or would you like to ..., well look at the graves. As far as I know you knew some of them."

"Yes, I did. Did you know what happened to them?"

"No, I'm sorry but I only arrived in Sunnydale a month ago. I don't know all the stories."

"No offence, but you seem awfully young. When have you been called?"

"I was called two months ago. I'm fourteen."

"Fourteen!?" 

Angel looked sadly at the girl in front of him. Such a young girl and such a destiny. How did the PTB's expect a young and untrained Slayer to fight in the final battle? That was probably the reason he was summoned.

"What about the other Slayer? How old is she? When was she called?"

"So many questions, Angel. But I can't answer them."

"What do you mean you can't answer them. I mean you know her, right? So I guess you have talked, right?"

"Yes. And I do know the answers to your questions. But it's not my place to give them to you. You have to talk with her yourself, Angel. That's all I can tell you."

"But.."

Angel was interrupted by a man calling "Natsuko".

"I'm here!" The young Slayer answered. And soon enough a young man joined them.

"Where have you been, Natsuko? I was waiting for you! Didn't we agree to meet at the gate?"

"Yes, we did. I apologize." She turned to Angel. 

"This is my watcher, Connor Summers."

"Connor, this is..."

"Angel." Her watcher interrupted her while he studied fascinated the vampire in front of him.

"It's time that you finally came home, father."

Two pairs of eyes looked at him in shock.

**TBC**

A.N.:

First of all I'm sorry that it took me so long to update this story but I was ill and even had to go to the hospital. Thanks for all the feedback I got. I love you guys!

I apologize for all the dead people in this part. 50 years is a long time so some of them had to die. I choose them randomly (after I choose the ones I need for this story!).

I hope to update soon, again. But first there will be more of "Glimpses".


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